One year ago today, I found out that I was pregnant. What a year it has been! :) On that Friday morning, T woke me up for school, just like every morning. I had been taking my temperature every morning to figure out my ovulation days for about 6 weeks, trying to see some kind of pattern. On this day, my temp had stayed high, so I knew that it was possible that I could be pregnant this first month that we had really tried. Somehow, I had in my head that it was going to take us 3 months and that if we started in May, then I would be pregnant by August, resulting in an April or May baby. When my temp stayed high, I decided to take the HPT just for kicks. I left the stick on the counter to 'process' while I got my clothes around and turned on the shower. I wasn't sure how long I was supposed to wait, so after a couple minutes I checked it. When I saw the word 'pregnant' on the stick - my immediate reaction was 'Holy Sh*t!" and should I take the other test in the box just to make sure? Shouldn't I be feeling sick and queasy and throwing up? I felt absolutely fine. Then I didn't know what to do - do I tell T now? Do I try to tell him in a cool way? He was out in the kitchen eating breakfast and I thought I had better tell him, since this was too big of a secret for me to keep to myself. I turned off the shower and came out with the stick and gave it to T. His immediate reaction was "How does this stick know that you're pregnant?" and "What's the error rate on those things?" Not exactly the first thought that I thought he would have. But, we had a nice moment and then I said I would call the doctor to get in soon. School would be out the next week and this day was the day of the talent show and was going to turn out to be the hottest day of the year. All day my head was totally spinning - was I really? should I eat that for lunch? how much wine have I had in the last 2 weeks? I don't have enough books yet to tell me what I need to be doing!! It was all that I could do to not tell everyone at school - but this was my first shot at being pregnant, I didn't know if it was really going to take, or what would happen. I can say with a lot of certainty that it was the most freaked out that I have ever been. A crazy mix of fear, anxiety, excitement, shock, joy, you name it, I was feeling it.
I know it's kind of gross, but I still have the stick. I was disappointed to see it about a week after and the word had faded. I should have taken a picture, I guess. Oh well, I can still see it as plain as day in my memory.
It's difficult for me to wrap my mind around this past year. It seems to have flown by in no time at all. I'm another year older, I've led another group of kids through 3rd grade, and now I'm a mom. That's still crazy to me- that someone will call me mom. Lila is awesome. We are soooo lucky to have such an angel. I cannot wait for summer to get here so I can play with my baby all day, every day! After how crappy I felt most of last summer, I'm anticipating a much more fun summer this year!
10 years ago
